Winning Is Not an Option. It’s a Must — Benny | Proof Of Life, Episode 32.
On firstborn pressure, African ambition, consistency, and building quietly but relentlessly.
Meet Benny, the most dependable person I know.
Proof of Life returns this week with the story of my friend turned brother. The kind of man who shows up. Not sometimes. Not when it is convenient. But consistently. Through pressure. Through responsibility. Through ambition.
In this episode, we talk about what it meant to step into the weight of being a firstborn son, the quiet discipline that shapes his leadership, his mission to interview founders across Africa, and how he somehow manages to juggle design, business, fitness, community, and love without dropping the ball.
Before you read further, let me share something personal.
Within our friend group, we rotate accountability partners. In 2024, during my MBA, Benny was mine for one of my most productive phases. That season remains one of my strongest. Four A’s. No missed deadlines. From simple check-ins to detailed follow-ups on every project, he did not just encourage me. He ensured I showed up. That is who he is.
Dependable is an understatement.
Enjoy this week’s Proof of Life.
Let’s begin where we always do. What does “Proof of Life” mean to you in this season of being many things to many people—designer, athlete, entrepreneur, partner, and community man?
Proof of Life for me means showing up, means consistency, and it means making it work, really!
Each time I scroll social media, I see one piece of content from you, and I am really proud of the way you consistently show up for the different shades of you. What systems, routines, or mindsets help you manage your time and energy without losing yourself?
Personally, I have seen the power of consistency, and because of how effective and transformative it is, I double down on it.
Beyond showing up for work and goals, you show up for people. On your last birthday, the room was filled with specific stories of how you had been there for each person. How do you intentionally cultivate that kind of presence and loyalty?
Every single person present at my birthday were individuals I don’t call friends anymore, I call them family. Family to me is everything, family is priority. If I can help, I show up!
As a firstborn son, there’s an unspoken responsibility that comes with the role. How has that shaped your leadership style, your pressure tolerance, and your view of success?
At 15 I stepped into the role of becoming a father, and showing up. I had to protect my siblings and be available, it wasn’t the most fun, but it’s been interesting. Living with 3 boys, they most times suck the tension out of you. Where I am from, winning is not an option, it’s a must.
What are some childhood memories that still influence the man you are becoming?
Fixing (i pass my neighour) generator by midnight with my dad because he didn’t want my mum to sleep in the heat.
You’re building businesses, including BusinessBee and your broader design work. What excites you most about what you’re building right now?
What excites me right now is that I get to speak to people far more intelligent than I am, and they are willing to share with me their journey in detail; it’s incredible.
(Editor’s note: This is also the reason I collect Proof Of Life.)
Through BusinessBee, you set out to interview one startup founder from each African country. What have you learned from those conversations? What’s the common challenge across the continent, and where do you see Africa’s biggest potential?
The way each country approaches their tech ecosystem defers, and it’s beautiful to see. The easily known challenge has to be capital and infrastructure. So many “wowing” ideas, very little environmental push to see it going. Africa’s biggest potential is her people, together, we can.
You’re a product designer at heart. What problem space do you enjoy solving the most, and what separates good design from great design?
Right now, A.I is top of mind, any product that has AI at it’s core, I love to be part of it. Understanding the basic principles of design and implementing it, so it makes the lives of the users easier.
Modelling. How did that begin? Was it strategic or accidental? And would you ever take it to the runway if the opportunity came?
(Side note - tell eccentric to give us all the clothes you model o!)
Modeling was by chance/fate/favour, everything all put together.
I definitely want to experience what runway modeling will look like, so I am looking forward to it.
You swim, play tennis, and once flirted with basketball. Be honest — which sport are you actually good at, and which one are you just doing jaga jaga?
Give me swimming and tennis anyday. I am game, but you see football ehn, I am what you call short one in the team.
For a man that has been consistent with the gym, we haven’t seen your gains o? Why do you keep going considering the terrible accident you had last year?
Hahahhaha.. When the gains are clear for all to see (TBB you need glasses or maybe another beer).
I go to the gym first for the VANITY, and then for the health benefits. I need to play with my grandchildren when I am 90.
Let’s talk relationships. What does your current relationship give to you — emotionally, mentally, spiritually? How has it refined you?
Hmmm… Everything if I am being honest. I am currently in a phase in my life where everything is moving fast. The calm and clarity that my relationship has given me has helped my perspective on it all.
Finally, give a subtle but clear message to the “mainland squad.” And then drop one random thought that’s been sitting in your mind lately
We need to show up more for ourselves, silence shouldn’t be an option.
Know God for yourself, and your life will be grateful for.
Lovely.